Funnies

[Noxide]

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[Noxide]

Contains Foul Language

[Noxide]

Science was a breath of fresh air
Within my whole High School career
The only school class
Where you could smell gas
That wasn't from your classmate's rear.

The spouse of a pretty young thing
Came home from the wars in the spring.
He was lame but he came
With his dame like a flame--
A discharge is a wonderful thing.

[Noxide]

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[Noxide]

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[odbot]

Various types of Girls.


HARD DISK GIRLS
She remembers everything, FOREVER

RAM GIRLS
She forget about you, the moment turn her off

WINDOW GIRLS
Everyone know that she can’t do a thing right, but no one can live without her.

SCREENSAVER GIRLS
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun

INTERNET GIRLS
She is cool but Difficult to access

SERVER GIRLS
Always busy when you need her.

MULTIMEDIA GIRLS
She make horrible thing look beautiful.

CD-ROM GIRLS
She is always faster and faster.

EMAIL GIRLS
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.

VIRUS GIRLS
Also known as “wife” when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if don’t try to uninstall her you will lose everything

[odbot]

If Women Ruled the World

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[odbot]

While I was driving down the M4 the other
day, (going a little faster than I should have been)



I passed under a bridge only to see a copper on the other side with a radar gun
laying in wait.



The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic
patronizing smirk, asked:



'Runway too short?'



To which I replied, 'I'm late for work.'







To which he asked, 'What do you do?'



'I'm a rectum stretcher,' I responded.



The copper was surprised and confused. 'A what? A rectum stretcher?? And just
what does a rectum stretcher do?'



'Well,' I said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two
fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side
until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole,
until it's about 6 feet.'





Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously, 'And just what do you do
with a six-foot a*sehole?'



To which I politely replied, 'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a
bridge...'







Speeding ticket: £105.00

Court costs: £45

Look on copper's face: Priceless.

[Belinda]

ahaha LOL ^^ +rep..

[Belinda]

Woohoo what a reduction