Funnies

[Noxide]

When it becomes a crime to love, you should probably consider dating
outside the family.

[Noxide]

A man is having a beer with his buddies at the bar and tells them,
"I'm divorcing my wife because she has disgusting habits. I went to
pee in the sink this morning and it was still full of dirty dishes..."

[Noxide]

To truly love another, you must first love yourself. And it wouldn't
kill you to wash your hands in between either.

[Noxide]

An uncertain young woman named Fern
Was so great she had lovers to burn.
She got into bed
With both Johnnie and Fred
And didn't know which way to turn.


There once was a lady named Mable,
whose ass was as big as a table.
"Never you mind."
said a friend of mine.
She's ready, willing, and able.



The climax, when Josie engages,
Is postponed for what seems to be ages.
Out of self-preservation
And to banish frustration
She has three or four fellows--in stages.

[Noxide]

There was a young lady named Melanie,
Who was asked by a man, "Do you sell any?"
She replied, "No, siree.
I give it for free.
To sell it, dear sir, is a felony.


I wooed a buxom young nude in Bermuda,
I was lewd, but my God! She was lewder.
She said it was crude
To be wooed in the nude --
I pursued her, subdued her, and screwed her!

[Noxide]

There is a guy who has a dog that doesn't obey him. Then he sees an ad in the paper for a great dog trainer. So, he decides to go to the dog trainer and get his dog trained.

The guy walks in the room and asks, "Can you train my dog, and are you a good trainer?"

The trainer replies, "Well, I can train your dog, and I will give you a demonstration of how good I am."

He dumped a box full of bones on the floor and blew a whistle.

The first dog came in and made a skeleton with the bones. "Wow!" said the guy, "What kind of dog is that?" "That's a nurse's dog," said the trainer.

Then he blows the whistle again and a second dog comes in the room. That dog makes a big building. The man says, "Wow! What kind of dog is that?" "That's an architect's dog," replies the trainer.

Then the trainer blows the whistle again and a third dog comes in. That dog takes the bones, screws the other two dogs and runs away. "Wow! What kind of dog is that?" says the man. "That's a lawyer's dog!"

[Noxide]

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[Noxide]

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[James]

This is Posts for the Funnies thread!

http://forum.mobiles24.com/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=2220

[Noxide]

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