Results 15,921 to 15,930 of 16280
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03-12-2011, 08:21 PM #15921
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"We must never be afraid to go too far, for truth lies beyond."
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05-12-2011, 11:56 PM #15922
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07-12-2011, 03:46 PM #15923
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A man's wife asks him to go to the store to buy some cigarettes. So he walks down to the store only to find it closed. So he goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers and one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.
After they've had their fun, he realizes its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my wife's going to kill me.
Have you got any talcum powder?" She gives him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then he goes home. His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and she is pretty ******.
"Where the hell have you been?!"
"Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking chick there and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her."
"Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!"
She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You God damn liar!! You went bowling again!!"
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07-12-2011, 11:20 PM #15924
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Slight bad language in this one kiddies.Last edited by EvilSpaghetti; 07-12-2011 at 11:22 PM.
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08-12-2011, 09:43 AM #15925
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08-12-2011, 04:19 PM #15926
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09-12-2011, 08:39 AM #15927
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"We must never be afraid to go too far, for truth lies beyond."
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09-12-2011, 09:50 AM #15928
✦ Luminary
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Because of the crisis also santa claus has this year financial problems, so this .maybe over about 10 years better. 
iousanta_shutterstock_20157397-224x130.jpg
something for everyone
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09-12-2011, 06:16 PM #15929
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10-12-2011, 03:31 AM #15930
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Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years. The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump. The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms. Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs. The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor. To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"
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